Editor's pick: top six erotic books!

Return from dog walk to mull over the thorny issue of my erotic bestseller. Just need unputdownable plot. And sympathetic characters. And an erotic technician. And possibly another title.

Ooh. An exciting email from the editor of the Erotic Review pings into my inbox. His top six erotic novels. Yes! In the interests of research, will add to my Christmas reading list.

1. The aforementioned Fanny Hill, or Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure by John Cleland.

2. The Simple Tale of Susan Aked by Anonymous

A bit like Fanny H., but as Victorian as an antimacassar.

3. Behind Closed Doors by Alina Reyes

I wish we'd published her. I love her style and gigantic imagination.

4. Blind Love & Other Stories by John Gibb

We did publish him. A brilliant collection of short stories which (grown up) boys need not be ashamed to read.

5. A Renaissance by Julie Charles

This has everything that 50 Shades of Grey has and much more, but happens to be beautifully written, too. And (grown up) girls need not be ashamed – on any level – to read this.

6. Heart Killer by Andy Nowicki

Our most recent book. Altogether more dark and disturbing. But there are erotic elements seething around 'in a mesh of sex, mysticism and vengeance'. 

Marvellous. Now, let's see:

Eliza Gray, or Memoirs of an Invisible Woman.

Eliza Gray, or Memoirs of a Doormat.
No, they don't really have the tingle factor.

The Simple Tale of Eliza Gray.
Nope... Dan will twist that into me being simple.

I know! Combining my must-read travel blog and erotic bestseller:

Eliza Gray's Secret Places.